Mystical Experience: What Happened After I Asked for Help

The Build-Up to My Mystical Experience

I had a mystical experience and an epiphany in the bathtub on the third morning after I came home from my 3rd Dr. Joe Dispenza event.

Right in the middle of a meltdown.

Which I talked about in this video.

So, here I am, having a reaction that trumps all the previous ones. My face is an open wound.
Flesh, blood and mush.

I spend the first two days doing everything in my power to stay calm and make myself feel better in any given way. The whole thing is a bit of a mystery at first.

I keep thinking: “What happened??”

And I know that something is up. Something is coming. I can feel it.

Which is why I stay very present. I don’t go into any drama. My mind is clear.

But I’m really, really sad. I don’t talk to anyone during those days. The exhaustion is real.

The first night I sleep for 14 hours.
The one after that for 12.

Mind you:

I was perfectly fine after my first two events. This fatigue is extreme.

Which is why I do nothing other than sit, bathe, eat, drink tea and meditate.

It’s Friday morning, and I get into the bathtub a third time. Something occurs to me.

I realize that I’ve spent the entire event obsessing over the way I looked and how I was going to be perceived. By other people. All. The. Damn. Time.

Especially during the walking meditations. Ridiculous. Because no one is watching you. No wonder I’m exhausted. Seven days of projecting all of my energy onto others, thinking about what they might be thinking about, and worrying about maintaining a standard I’ve singlehandedly set for myself.

It’s so ridiculous I burst out into tears.
An hour goes by, still in the bathtub, and then another thought hits me:

Why don’t you ask for help?

Anyone who’s heard my story knows that I was determined to heal on my own at home. All alone. And that’s what I did. I wore the experience as a badge of honor. No shame in that.

Of course I did.

Anyone else would do the same. Few accomplishments make me prouder.

The problem?

The marathon had barely begun. I had a long, long, long way to run. Many milestones to hit.

But why do it all alone?

No professional athlete would ever decide to train on their own.

In other words: Choose not to get help from coaches, nutritionists, physical therapists and mindset coaches. That’s just stupid. My badge of honor had turned into a stale way of thinking that now worked against me. Not for me.

That realization made me even sadder. Why are you building walls around you when you could just ask for help? Which is exactly what I did.

The Moment My Mystical Experience Began

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and asked the Universe for help.

“I just need some assistance. This is too much to handle. Help me. Please.”

I cried some more. A deep sense of peace came over me. I got up and applied 4 different creams on my face. Wrapped myself in a silky robe. Lay down on my bed with a pair of headphones attached to my phone.

Chose a lying down meditation – which was the only thing I could bring myself to do at that moment. I had sensed that something was coming during those days.

But not… this. I felt a strong spasm in my right knee. It came from within.

I thought:

“How weird, must be something after the heat of the bath.”

An injection of what we call ‘love’ followed. That word doesn’t even begin to describe the sensation. Or what happened next.

Now I had company.

They appeared.

Giving me the experience of a lifetime that lasted nearly two hours. One that I will never, ever forget.

The moral of the story?

It’s okay to ask for help.

That’s when my mystical experience began.

I understand that mindset because I, too, thought like that for a long time. Independence is beautiful. But there’s a (fine) line between healthy self-reliance and unnecessary suffering and even torture.

Asking for help isn’t a weakness. It’s a sign of strength.

When we resist reaching out, we are choosing the old story, saying:

“I should be able to handle this”

or:

“I should’ve figured this out by now”

or

“People will think I’m failing.”

None of those beliefs are true, they’re just something you’ve practiced. And when we give them power, we slow down our own healing. The most surprising part of this mystical experience wasn’t what happened, or the physical sensation, or even the bliss.

It was the realization that help was always available, but I had to be willing to receive it.

Whether it’s divine guidance, a practitioner, a friend, a coach, or a course – it’s okay to lean in. That’s why I created my mind training program.

Because I know how hard it is to do this alone.
I know the hours it takes, the fear it induces, and the voice in your head that whispers:

“You should’ve figured this out by now.”

You don’t have to figure it all out alone. Not anymore.

If you’ve been struggling, holding it together for too long, or pushing through without support – consider this your invitation.

To exhale.
To soften.
To let someone help you.

Someone who’s been exactly where you are now.

I created my upcoming course because I believe healing happens in community, not in isolation.

It’s for the one who’s done all the things.
Who’s read the books.
Who’s meditated.
Who’s visualized.

But who still wakes up thinking:

“Why do I feel so alone in this?”

You don’t need to be fixed, but you do deserve to be supported.

The moment I asked for help, everything changed.

Not because someone swooped in to save me. But because I allowed space for something bigger to enter. So let this be your reminder:

It’s Okay To Ask For Help

You are not here to do it all alone. You are allowed to receive. You are worthy of support.

Because the most mystical experience of all…is realizing you were never meant to carry this alone.