A limiting belief: perfection

A wise friend suggested I’d think about any limiting beliefs that I could be holding on to and that might be stopping me from going full speed ahead.

My initial thought was: “I know myself, I’ve figured it out“…to which all I can say is HA!

Queen of Everything 2 years and counting

It’s now been two years since I started kAAKAO. In that time I’ve founded a company, gone through a sad business breakup, fought for a dying business with every ounce of me, launched a product with two SKUs now available in seven countries, been diagnosed with trauma, hired our first employee and sold tens of thousands illegal chocolate bars.

Before that I worked on HELPINGS for three years and self-published The Book That Changed My Life. I also wrote 500 recipes that are ready for my next cookbook and learned everything I now know about recipe development and ingredients. 

Helpings recipes

And before that I was really sick, diagnosed with severe eczema, food allergies and asthma as a baby and living with those conditions through the majority of my life.

That limiting belief

My limiting belief hit me like a bus as I was listening to an audio book about a woman struggling with weight issues and telling her story about how that affected her perception of worthiness. Her limiting belief was: “I can’t make any money before I’m thin”

We all know that’s absurd, but so are the things we tell ourselves.

I then realised that I spent three decades waiting to look perfect, i.e. to be healed from my skin issues and eczema, at which point I would finally be a good example of someone who was successful and who ‘had made it’.


And EVERYTHING was dependent on that.

I’ve lived as if nothing was really possible before that. I’ve avoided men and relationships thinking I was flawed. I haven’t allowed myself certain clothes, insisting that my skin needed to change before I could wear them. I’ve isolated myself in my lovely little flat, waiting to feel whole. And I’ve refused to share the story of how I got to where I am today, because I still didn’t feel or look ‘perfect’.

Chasing the illusion

We all know perfection doesn’t exist, so I could just as well spend the rest of my life chasing my tail without ever catching it. 

Perfection is a limiting belief. It’s evil. And it makes us feel less worthy.

Unworthy, which is even worse. 

So today, right now at 5.02AM, I’m letting go of that belief – or at least acknowledging that I have it.

I’ve been waking up between 1-3 AM for the last few weeks, lying awake hour after hour unable to sleep. The struggle for perfection is exhausting.

Suddenly, I’m so, so ready to fall asleep, hopefully waking up in a few hours feeling more whole than ever.

And I urge you to think about your own limiting beliefs, so that you don’t cut yourself off from all the glorious things life has to offer.

What could it be?

Stephanie is the founder of Helpings and the creator of all content on the platform. Watch her TEDx talk, 'Holy Shit', about digestion on YouTube, organized at King's Collage London in 2016. Stephanie is currently building her second business, a chocolate brand called kAAKAO, and she shares her experience by means of inspiring other entrepreneurs to excel in business and in life.

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